Your child’s thoughts about their gender or sexual orientation may come as a surprise to you.
Studies show that children’s thoughts about their true gender often begin to emerge at primary school age or earlier. They also often have some idea of their own sexual identity by the time they reach adolescence.
Address the thoughts and feelings expressed by the child without downplaying them. Take your time and listen. It is best to put your fears, worries and thoughts about your child’s future aside in this situation: the child wants to be heard and accepted here and now.
You can discuss your concerns and feelings later, e.g. with your partner or in parental peer groups.
Allow the child to process their thoughts at their own pace. Give your child space to grow and time to find their own identity. As they age, their own experience of their gender may become more specific and their sexual interest may also change.
Tell your child that all paths of development are allowed. Let them be themself and respect their experience and the way that they express their identity. You can show acceptance in everyday situations, e.g. when you talk about other people, watch TV together or read stories.
Be by your child’s side if they have wishes regarding matters such as everyday practices that they would like to express to their teachers, for example.
If your child has anxiety over their thoughts, do not hesitate to seek conversational help for them.
