Parenthood is built on attachment. It is an opportunity and a journey that will take new twists and turns as the child grows. There is no script for parenthood, and there are many different kinds of good parenting. Parenthood is also a ‘team sport’ and you are not expected to cope with it alone. Parenthood is not a particular characteristic of an adult; it is a relationship between a child and an adult. A child can have a meaningful, close relationship with several adults. An adult has a unique relationship with each of their children and the relationship of each child to their loved ones is also unique.
A parent is a true multi-talent of day-to-day life! Parenting is all about loving, caring, protecting, guiding, learning together and inspiring. You have to be a diplomat, a skilled home cook and a security guard. However, you are still only a human, and it is wise to be merciful to yourself. The other parent or someone close to the child can also be more skilled at some aspect than the other, and this is okay. You can also try to learn something new! Parenting is a skill that can be learned, and people have good natural capabilities for it.
Parenting and raising a child can be wonderful, confusing, heart-warming, annoying and much more besides. Parenting can give rise to all kinds of feelings. A family’s day-to-day life and various situations bring challenges and joy.
There are many models and instructions available to help you with bringing up children, but ultimately, you will discover the style that best suits your family either by yourself or with your partner.
As a parent, you must make the choices regarding your family’s everyday life:
• What do you do together?
• What kind of boundaries do you set?
• How do you let your child influence what the family does together?
• How does your family eat?
• what do you eat,
• together or everyone separately?
• How do you spend your free time?
• What are you teaching your child about being an adult?
You can find plenty of support and information about all parenting and child raising matters on the Family Support pages and through the links provided.
In the video series produced by the Family Federation of Finland, priests discuss children’s upbringing.
You can find more videos of parenthood on YouTube (the Family Federation of Finland) (in Finnish).
Your childhood family and your experience affect how you act as a parent. Some people may end up being like the adults of their childhood family, while others aim to behave differently. As a parent, it can be interesting to think about where your habits are coming from.